Today I am participating in a Blog Hop. This is week 1 of an online Bible study with Melissa Taylor from Proverbs 31. We are studying the new book by Karen Ehman "Let.It.Go." (This is my second online Bible study with Melissa. I did "Made to Crave" last January and LOVED it! Looking at her schedule for the year, I have a feeling I will be signing up for at least a couple more of her studies.)
There were three topics to choose from for this week's Blog Hop. I am choosing to talk about topic #3:
Ooo! Shiny! – Chapter Two. This world is full of shiny things begging for our attention. What are things in your life that have turned into controlling tangents? Let’s help each other break just one!
After reading Chapter 2, highlighting, taking notes and re-reading the chapter, I did some journaling. I thought I had figured out exactly what my big controlling tangents are. Karen describes tangents as those "activities, hobbies, people or time-wasting habits that knock us off course."
I can admit honestly and with strong conviction one of my biggest controlling tangents is Facebook and time on the computer, reading web page after web page. I almost obsessively check Facebook several, make that many, many, many times a day. Before I know it I have spent not minutes but hours on Facebook or the internet and accomplished nothing. Meanwhile, the laundry is piled up, there are dirty dishes in the sink, and real work to be done around here. Not to mention my beautiful girls would love nothing more than for Mommy to sit and play or read or do anything really as long as it was time spent with them.
As Karen suggested, I need to set up some "big-picture guidelines" to prevent Facebook and computer time being the problem it so often is. After all, Facebook isn't all bad. I love being able to keep in touch with family and friends and being able to share with them what the Lingg family is up to. Several of the groups I'm involved with at church use Facebook as a means of communication and a very effective, quick and easy way to share news and prayer requests and praises. It's when I allow myself to be consumed by it, when I start comparing myself to what other people are saying and doing - that's when the trouble begins.
Before writing this post, I hopped around and read a few of the blogs posted by others participants. I could relate to many of the women. Karen's post, however, made me realize yet another tangent that last night did not come to me.
I don't want to be left out. I want to fit in. I want to belong so badly I am not always true to myself in order to fit in with the group or person I am around. And I think I have had this problem since childhood. I can understand having this feeling as a little girl, but how can I still struggle with this feeling as a 35-year-old woman???
It is only week 1 of this study. We are only a couple of chapters into the book and already God has revealed some hard truths I have wanted to avoid and ignore for far too long.
I am hopeful though. Hopeful that through this study I will learn "how to stop running the show and start walking in faith" (Karen Ehman).